So, have you ever had someone tell you to turn the music down? Just a little too loud? You need, you need to turn the music down or in the words of philosopher Nathan Fiteen, have you had somebody say, turn the music up, just, just turn the music up or are you the person that when you're riding around town and you're trying to find something, you turn the music down so you can see better. Come on, you know who you are, man. There's all kind of turning in life. We can turn things up, we can turn things down, we can turn away, we can turn against. But one of the best turning that exists in the world is to turn toward, to turn toward a research report on newlyweds said that those who were still married after six years after the wedding, they found that they turned toward one another 86% of the time and newlyweds that didn't make it to year six. In other words, the marriage fell apart before year six. They only turned toward each other 33% of the time. Now, what does it mean to, to turn to someone in a relationship. Well, my guess is we could outline that in a lot of different ways. Here's just one way, one way that you could say that we're turning toward is that you pay attention to the person instead of just kind of doing your own thing to turn towards someone means that you spend time making sure that you are dialed into that person that you're aware of, that person that you're looking toward their needs to turn towards someone does not mean that when they come and approach you, you say things like, hey, can't you see, can't, can't you see, I'm working here, can't you see, I'm, I'm taking a nap. Can't you see, I'm, I'm watching the game. Can't you see, I'm watching The Golden Bachelor. You know, can't, you, can't you see that I'm, I'm trying to, to, to practice my putting here. Can't you see that? I'm, I'm crushing candy here? Can, can't you see that? That's not what turning toward means? That's, that's more of a turning against the research report said that the spouses that, that made the decision to turn toward one another created an atmosphere where there was not a lot of conflict. And on the flip side, when you had spouses that made the decision to turn away from one another, it created an atmosphere of, of conflict of, of harm, of disengagement of indifference. But those who made the decision to turn toward one another created the kind of energy that, that within the relationship, there was satisfaction, there was joy, there, there was happiness. So generally speaking, when it comes to relationships and life, are we looking for damage or are we looking for satisfaction? Which, which one would be on our radar that we would want the most damage or satisfaction? We continue our series navigating life where we're considering the the keys to making good healthy decisions. Maybe we could say the, the process in a way of making good healthy decisions. And we're looking in the Bible at the book of James and what James is going to do is he's going to help us see that whether we're talking about relationships or anything else in life, especially the decisions in life. What's most important is what we are turning toward? So what are you turning toward in life with the decisions that you're facing right now? Some of them big, some of them small. W what are you turning toward? Are you turning toward your gut feelings? Are you turning to your family or turning towards your friends? Are you turning toward your, your political ideas and your political opinions? Are you turning toward the, the excellent scientific advice that's coming from tiktok on everything in the world? Where are you turning? What, what is it that you're turning toward? And, and maybe a fair question will be, does it matter? Does it really matter what we're turning toward? Well, it does and Why? Well, let's find out together. We're going to be looking at James chapter three verse 14. Our message today is titled Turning Toward Real. Turning Toward Real. And this is what James says, beginning in verse 14. But if you have bitter jealousy and selfish ambition in your heart, bitter jealousy, selfish ambition, not the kind of stuff you want on your resume or on your tombstone. So, so what do these mean? Well, we're going to unpack them just, just for a moment to try to just think through them. Bitter jealousy is when you are undone, you are completely put out because somebody got something and you didn't get that something. Why does she get a new car? And I have a used car? Why does he get to play golf? And, and I have to work? Well, why do they get lobster and, and I get hot pockets? We, we have these moments, right? We're like, what is it? Why? Why is it that, that they get that? And, and I don't get that a heart that's wrapped up with bitter jealousy is often angry and harsh and unkind. Now, what does that look like in real life? Well, in real life, anger and, and harshness and unkindness. It can come across through yelling, it can come across through, um kind of sarcastic jabs, it can come from cruel words and it can come from really doing a number of different things that directly or indirectly create problems in the lives of other people. However, being angry and being harsh and being unkind can also display itself in using the silent treatment or in indirectly or directly just dismissing the needs of other people. Bitter jealousy is a prickly form of resentment, prickly, meaning that it's like a cactus. It, it sticks you. Right. And, and what happens when you get stuck by a cactus? Well, it hurts and that's what bitter jealousy does. It hurts other people and it also hurts you. What does that mean? How, how could it hurt us? Well, think of it this way. When I was in high school every year, there was just two of us that ran for class president every year. It was me and Rod kite. I think I may have shared some of this with y'all years ago. But, but Rod and I always ran against each other every year for class president. Rod won freshman year, he won sophomore year. I won junior year and then he won senior senior year. He won student body president and beat me out. And, and the reason really why he beat me out is because Rod is still a fantastic guitar player. I mean, fantastic electric guitar player and, and Rod wrote his speech that year, the words to the tune of Sweet Child of Mine by Guns and Roses. And when we gave our speeches in front of the whole student body, Rod was there with his guitar. And he played and sang his speech to the tune of Sweet Child of mine. It was pretty epic. I'm pretty sure I voted for Rob. You know, I mean, I, I, it was, it was just that good. Now, imagine after I lost that freshman year and that sophomore year that I went home and I made a voodoo doll of rod and I went home after school every day and, and got little pins and stuck them in that little voodoo doll. Just, just like a cactus would stick and hurt. And then at night I would sit around and I would whine and I would complain that I was a better candidate and I had better ideas and I was more fun and I had cooler parachute pants, you know, and that's just, oh, I was just whining. No, no, no, no. I, I was better. I was better. I was better. Now, where would that have gotten me? Well, more than likely it would not have gotten me to the point that I actually decided, hey, I'm going to keep at this and, and junior year I'm going to win and I did what it probably would have done is I would have dropped out of school and stayed at home, playing with voodoo dolls and eating hot pockets, you know, and done nothing with my life. You see the reality is bitter jealousy. It, it does this thing on the inside. It, it does something to us. It doesn't just do something to other people, it does something to us. Now, look, we're all going to have moments of jealousy. OK? We are, it just happens. But again, pattern, pattern pattern, the Bible is always directed us to what is the pattern that we see in our lives. King Solomon said this in Proverbs 14 30. A tranquil heart is life to the body but jealousy is rottenness to the bones, bitter jealousy. It, it can rot your bones. It, it can work on the inside that prickly resentment. It can, it can physiologically do something to you. Years ago, I heard a story about a senior adult lady who was at a church in Oklahoma and, and she had some type of bone disease and she was experiencing a lot of pain and, and she went to see the pastor and, and they were sitting there talking and she began to just talk about something somewhere in the conversation. It came up that she had this, this grudge against this woman in the church. She was just bitter toward this woman in the church. And, and the pastor said, you know, you, you need to call her, you need to go to her, you need to ask for forgiveness. It's, it's not a good thing. And so the woman after a few days got convicted and decided to go do that. And as the story went, if I remember, right, a few months later, whatever her bone disease was, was gone. Now, that's not to say that every time we confess in that all of our health things are going to disappear. But it does just kind of illustrate that what Solomon said was true. Bitter jealousy. It hurts us on the inside. Jesse Udall is a wife and mom and in recent years has been an adjunct professor over at Columbia International University. She gave five specific ways that bitter jealousy is destroying us when it's in our lives. First. She said it saps our energy. We are, we're so consumed. We're like on a, a spinning wheel of constantly comparing ourselves to, to other people and other people at work and, and celebrities and other churches or whatever it may be. We're, we're just constantly comparing and it saps all of our energy because we're just on a spinning wheel of, well, they have this and I don't have this and, and on and on it goes secondly, she says it makes love. Impossible love. Very simply put is, is warning and desiring the highest good for someone else. Bitter jealousy would be the opposite of that. You don't want the highest good for other people. You're you're jealous when good happens to them. Someone described it this way, it's like drinking poison and wanting the other person to die. I mean, the math just it makes no sense whatsoever. Third. She says it's associated with evil things when you see bitter jealousy and envy in the Bible. It's always in a little list with the worst of the worst things we're going to talk about this, this evil. A little, a little later in the message. Fourth, she says it leads to hate and harm. What happens with bitter jealousy is we begin to think, well, God's short changing me. You know, I, I'm not getting something either I want or something I feel like I deserve. And when that happens, we, we begin this, this hateful attitude toward anybody that has good stuff or to anybody that has what we want. And, and if we're not careful, we'll start having a hateful attitude toward God. Well, God, why don't I don't have this? Why don't I have this? Why? Why is my health like this? Why don't I have more money, whatever it may be? And fifth, she says that bitter jealousy does not lead to wisdom and truth. If, if our hearts are obsessed with bitter jealousy, we will not make good decisions. We won't a heart obsessed with bitter jealousy does not make good, healthy, wise decision because bitter jealousy and wisdom don't go together. So we don't need to turn toward bitter jealousy. We, we need to turn away James also says we need to turn away from selfish ambition. Selfish ambition is an unhealthy zeal to, to make a name for yourself. It, it has the idea in the, in the original language of, of having a party spirit and that's not like a, a birthday party or a tailgate party. It's, it's more like we would think of, of a political party. In other words, the, the picture here is that you have an unhealthy zeal to beat out your rivals and, and make your way to the top to make sure that, that you're the one that, that takes over what's happening and, and a party spirit is something that even when we're doing something wrong, we say it's OK because it's good for the party. You know, it's good, it's good for the agenda. And that's, that's what selfish ambition will do it, it will begin to redefine truth for us. But James didn't really talk about politicians here. He's, he's actually talking about the church. The, the tents of these verbs are that this kind of stuff was already going on in the church that there was this selfish ambition that had found its way into the church and what people were doing was they were creating sides, they were trying to get people on their side on, on different issues. Now, let me be clear, they were trying to get people on their side, not God's side. The goal was not the gospel, what wasn't being together for the gospel? It was, hey, I, I need some people over, over here on, on my side with what I'm doing and, and that's what selfish ambition creates. It creates unnecessary division, it creates unnecessary rivalry. The, the kind of rival that, that kind of forces people to, to choose sides at home. It's a, a child choosing one parent over the other. We know this. Right. Well, mom will tell me no, but dad will tell me. Yes. Right. I mean, we, we understand that or, or it might be a, a parent choosing one child over the other. Well, little Susie makes great grades and little Tommy never does anything. Right. You know. So, so we, I understand we, we see it this notion of, of selfish ambition and, and choosing sides at work at school on the court on the field, even in the church, the selfish ambition, it creates the kind of rivalry where groups are formed and they're either formed around a person or they can be formed around an idea and, and those things are formed in such a way that that becomes the driving force behind what's going on and the actual purpose of whatever the group or organization is actually gets put off to the side because of this one person or this one agenda or these two people or these two agendas and regardless of, of who and the how and, and however it comes together, this type of selfish ambition, it's destructive like it's, it's really destructive. One day Jesus was talking to a group of religious leaders and he repeated to them the words that the prophet Isaiah had said 600 years before this is what Jesus repeated. Matthew 15 verse eight. This people honors me with their lips, but their heart is far away from me and in vain. Do they worship me teaching his doctrines? The commandments of men? See, this is why selfish ambition is so dangerous, particularly for Christians and believers. Because selfish ambition convinces us, fools us into thinking that whatever it is that we're doing is actually what God wants. It convinces us that our personal opinions or our personal preferences are our personal agendas have to be God. So this is what God wants. This is exactly what God would want to happen. But it's rarely if ever true when it comes to selfish ambition because selfish ambition is not Godly ambition. Look, we're all going to have moments. None of us are perfect. We're all going to have moments where we're, we have some bitter jealousy. We all have moments where we're going to be a little, a little selfish in our ambition. But again, the, the question always goes back to pattern. Who are we normally? What happens normally in our lives? Does that mean we can't be ambitious? Does that mean we can't run for political office? Does that mean we, we can't try to beat our, our rival sports team? No, it doesn't. There are ways when it comes to, to politics and sports and anything else in life where we can be ambitious and in such a way that, that we are working with a kind of energy. That's for the good of other people, for the, for the good of the entire situation, for the whole group or for the, the whole circumstance. And especially as Christians, there's a way that we can be ambitious that we're working towards something that would glorify God, we're working towards something that would bring honor to God's name. That's, that's good ambition. And even in sports, in sports, there is a way to be ambitious in sports that, that creates an atmosphere that builds up teamwork and, and discipline and victory without resenting with prickly resentment, the opposing team. And I would graciously say during college football season, we, we need a little more of that kind of God word ambition. So there, there's ways to be ambitious. Ambition itself is, is not ungodly, selfish, ambition is ungodly. Ambition is not ungodly, selfish. Ambition is ungodly and even jealousy is not ungodly. In fact, the, the word for jealousy, it, it comes from this word that means zeal zealous. In fact, the Bible says in Exodus that our God is a jealous God, meaning that he has a pure and just and right zeal to be worshiped as the one true God over all the universe. So it's not that ambition is evil. It's not that jealousy is evil, but bitter jealousy is evil and, and selfish ambition is evil because they're not from God. They are prickly, they are sticky, they are damaging, they are harmful and James gives us a much deeper reason why we as Christians need to turn away from bitter jealousy and selfish ambition. Look at the next part of verse 14, do not be arrogant and so lie against the truth. Bitter jealousy, selfish ambition will make you a, a liar. What does that mean? Well, the word he uses here is, is arrogance. Now, arrogance is an unhealthy zeal to bring attention to yourself or an unhealthy zeal to say that you are the owner of all the right answers. Yeah, we don't have anybody like that in our family, right? My mom has always joke. Well, you know, a welsh is always right. I mean, it happens a lot. You know, I mean, I don't know what to tell her. We all have those, those moments where I, well, my answers are the right way. I, I know that is right. But the sense of, of arrogance here that James is pointing out, it's, it's boasting and bragging that your ways are the wisest ways that whatever you say, everybody else should follow. No, nobody should even question. And James says that if you're like that and you profess to be a Christian, meaning if, if that characterizes the normal ways that you deal with everybody in life and you profess to be a Christian. He said the math is, is off, there's something wrong with the math. In fact, the language here in this phrase is where we get our word hypocrite. The Lord hypocrite is, is pointing out and James is pointing out that bitter jealousy and, and selfish ambition and, and arrogance. If, if, what if that's what you're known for the most? It means that in some way you're not for real that there's, there's something different about you. You're, you're saying one thing you're doing another, you, you have a fantastic, really good looking mask that you wear on Sunday mornings that says that you're a saint, but that people have to deal with you all the time. Know that you live like the devil. This is the, the picture that we see throughout the Bible. It's not just in, in these words from James. So what does this hypocritical arrogance look like in, in real life? Here's just some snapshots a person like this is overly or unnecessarily competitive. Ok? Again, competition is not evil but, but overly or unnecessarily competitive. They love to argue. They always want to voice their opinion. They are consistently criticizing and complaining almost everything they do not like for other people to succeed and they have a my way or the highway attitude now look all right. We all have moments where all of those things can be in our life again. Ok? We can cut ourselves some slack. We are still sinful people. But again, pattern, pattern, pattern pattern. I'm a Christian. But the things of Jesus are rarely seen. These are the things that are, are often seen that. That's the picture that we always see in scripture. So if, if that is a picture of someone who is hypocritically arrogant, what's the opposite of that? What's the opposite of a person who's bitterly jealous? What's the opposite of a, a person who is selfishly ambitious? Well, this is how Jesus said it. Mark chapter nine. If anyone wants to be first, he shall be last of all and servant of all. Now, if we're honest, those words from Jesus sound like the exact opposite of what everything in life tells us to be our culture and our society. This is not really what we normally hear. And yet there it is this very clear, simple advice from the greatest ruler, the greatest rescuer, the greatest redeemer ever, the king of kings and the Lord of Lords says that in God's economy, greatness is found in someone who is a humble servant. Let me repeat that as we head into election time, as we head into football season, as we head into PT A meetings, as we head into whatever else it is that we're in life in the weeks ahead. Jesus said that in God's economy, the greatest person is the person who is a humble servant. Ron Blue said this a truly wise person does not seek glory or gain. He is gracious and giving, not glory or gain but gracious or giving. So each of us just for a second, let's let's just take a little, little test of our own hearts and minds. Which, which one do we see most in our life or, or let's just be fair. Which one do we see more in our life? Is there a greedy desire for glory and gain or is there a desire to be gracious and giving uh along the lines of exactly what Jesus has called us to do? And might I add what Jesus example when he walked on earth? A wise Christian is not perfect. Ok? None of us are but a wise Christian is going to strive to fight the good fight of turning not toward bitter jealousy and not toward self ambition, but but turning away and turning toward having a faith that is real, not just a profession of faith, but a true possession of faith. And why should we strive for a fight like that? Why, why does it demand our time? Well, James tells us in verse 15, this wisdom is not that which comes down from above but is earthly natural demonic. Yeah, he went there. James says that bitter jealousy, selfish ambition, this, this sense of arrogance that it is natural and earthly. Now this isn't like, you know, natural, earthly organic food that you can get at earth fair or whole foods. Ok? That's, that's not what it's talking about. This is talking about something that is not supernatural, it is not heavenly and it is not the kinds of attitudes that come from God. The word for natural here is where we get the word psyche. What is your psyche? Well, your, your psyche simply put is, is kind of our natural animal instincts. We could even say it. It's the way our mind works apart from God. Here's a, just a couple of examples of, of how our, our natural psyche can, can get us in trouble. Uh Ron Daniel says this, if I'm angry at someone, my psyche says, oh, you don't need them, it's ok to hate them. They're the source of your pain. Or he says, when I have a personality problem, my psyche will tell me we'll find out where it all began. See if there's someone you can blame it on, so you don't have to take responsibility. See, our psyche is full of natural wisdom and, and what we need is supernatural wisdom. Now, that doesn't mean that all natural wisdom is evil. God has been very gracious and, and he gives doctors and nurses and law enforcement and military and politicians and scientists and all other kind of people in life. Uh the ability to learn and, and grow in wisdom, wise things that help us in everyday life. But what James is asking is, what are you feeding your psyche? What is it that you're, you're feeding your heart and your mind the most? Are you feeding your heart and mind a lot of unique natural wisdom? Are you feeding your heart and mind a lot of common sense. Are you feeding yourself the wisdom of God? James says that bitter jealousy, selfish ambition, this sense of arrogance, it's, it's earthly and it's natural and it's demonic. Demonic. He goes there. It's not just bad etiquette. It's not just bad etiquette to be bitterly jealousy. A bit, bitterly jealous or selfishly ambitious. It's actually demonic. It's not from God if these things, if this arrogant zeal to have your way and to criticize everybody who won't go along with you, if that's the, the most zealous part of who you are, if the most consistent part of who you are, James is saying that if we're like that, we're living like a child of the devil, we're living more devil like than, than godlike. You don't wanna do that. That's, that's not a good thing, you know, it's not a good thing for us to be that way. And I can promise you if we're thinking that way, we will not be making good decisions even if everybody around says we're making good decisions. If we are functioning in such a way, that bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance is driving who we are. We will not make good wise decisions. In fact, it doesn't take a whole lot of stretching for us to look even at our political landscape, not just in this country but in the world. And is there any doubt that we are where we are in so many different ways in culture and society, whether it's politics or school or work or anything else. When the demanding traits that we seem to promote and even affirm the most are bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance. We, we overlook them as long as the finished product is something that's, that's good for us. It's not good for us. Everything in the Bible says it's not good for us because it's not from God or likewise. Why are we so stressed out? Why are we so anxious? Why are we so angry? Why are we so afraid? Why are we so put out and frustrated with so many things in life? Why are we struggling so much to, to make simple decisions? Why is there so much panic over making decisions? Could it be that what we are feeding ourselves is the wrong diet. We are feeding ourselves on an endless supply of news updates and sports updates and crime updates and weather updates and, and an endless binge of, of youtube videos or, or social media streams. We, we are filling ourselves with all the things that take us away from what we actually want the most. And that is joy and happiness and peace and contentment and satisfaction and, and those things can only ultimately be found in God. So again, for all of us, just a moment of, of test for ourselves. How much time are we spending? Feeding ourselves the truth and the glory and the majesty and the love and the grace and the mercy of the things of God as compared to how much we're feeding ourselves all the other things in life. And look, we're all guilty of it. We, we're all guilty of it in some way, shape or form. We, we have something that we're addicted to something that, that we look at and, and listen to more than anything else. Well, whatever is filling our minds according to Jesus, it's filling our hearts and it'll be seen in our attitudes and our actions, it'll be seen in our demeanor and it will be seen in our decisions. Our decision making is completely wrapped up in what we're filling our minds with. And if it's bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance, that's what's going to come out and that's how we're going to make decisions. Now, is there a way to flip the script? Is there a way to, to not make decisions that are full of, of so much bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance? Is there a way to not be a hypocrite? Well, there is, there's a way for us to do that and it comes from focusing on and desiring what is real. You see every single one of us, we, we have decisions that we have to make. Um, all of those decisions for all of us are in the future. Some of you have a decision you needing to make, right? After church. Where are you going to go to lunch? Right. I mean, that's a big decision. I mean, it is for me, I, I'm hungry. So, you know, we, we have decisions and they may be five minutes from now. They may be 15 minutes from now. They may be five days from now. They may be five weeks from now. They may be five years from now. They may be 50 years from now. But, but all of us, every single one of us we have decisions to make in life and all of those decisions are in the future. The last book of the Bible is an incredible vision of divine inspired messages that God gave to John while he was on the Isle of Patmos, a Greek island. And one of the messages that John writes about is a message about Jesus of Nazareth. Most of it is pointing to Jesus, but there's one particular message and, and it's all kind of in one sentence. And it, it's really amazing because in this one sentence, it tells us the historical truth of who Jesus is, of what he's done and of why that historical truth and that historical reality matters for the future. So it's a a message about the future, but it's found in, in the truth of history, the truth of the moment, the truth of Jesus. And the message goes like this revelation, 59 worthy are you to take the scroll and to break its seals. So there's this scroll in the future and only Jesus is the one who can open the scroll and the scroll is the full and final will of God. For the rest of eternity, we, we have Jesus being the only one who can open the scroll. The next part for you, we're slaughtered and you purchase people for God with your blood from every tribe, every language, every people and every nation. This is one sentence. Speaking of what Jesus did in history and what he's going to do in the future. The language here is, is prophetic. We, we call this a apoca apocalyptic type of writing here. But if, if you take all that and just put it on hold for a second and this, this incredible vision just kind of put some of the language on hold for a second. I I want you to listen to what Jonathan Parnell asked about this verse. He said this, if you put that on hold, do you believe that the Jesus here referred to is a real person not, you know, not a Harry Potter, Narnia type of book? That's, that's not what revelation is. Oh Look at this fantastic, you know, look at this language that, that, that's not it. Is this a real person? Do you believe that that the person described the one whose glory shall never end? The one who we sang? Crown him with many crowns? Because his reign will never stop. Do you believe he's a real person? He goes on. Can you picture as a possible scenario? You wrapping your arms around the shoulders of this man? Can you feel what it would be like to hug him like you would hug your dad? Do you believe that you could with your fingers trace the blistered scars on his hands and then as clear as you've ever heard anything before? Listen, as he speaks to you, he looks at you with his eyes and he talks to you. He says your name. He says that he loves you. He says that he has all authority in heaven and earth and that he'll never ever leave you. Do you believe that Jesus is real? Not, not just the amazing, incredible language that he's worthy to open the scrolls that he's, he's been slaughtered and he's, he's purchased the souls of men and women and boys and girls. But, but do you think he's, he's real? Because if Jesus is real, then it changes the decision you're facing tomorrow no matter how big or how small. If you believe that Jesus is real, he affects your decisions. The reality of Jesus Christ impacts the way we think it impacts the way we decide. And if Jesus has all authority in heaven and earth, that means turning toward him and turning away from bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance. It means that turning toward Jesus means that suddenly you now in the big and small decisions. Have a unique energy. You have a unique drive, you have a unique confidence that comes with every decision you will make. Why, why would you have unique energy and unique confidence, unique, peace, unique calm because dear friend in your heart of hearts, you are holding to the truth that Jesus is real. And if he's real, that changes everything because no matter what happens, no matter what happens in our heart and our mind, no matter what happens in our health or at work or at school or at church or at home or anywhere else, what we have in Jesus is real. It's not a fairy tale. It's not a myth, it's not a legend. So because that's true, let's turn down the sound of bitter jealousy and selfish ambition and arrogance. That is plenty loud everywhere we go and let's turn up the sound of the one that will never ever leave us or forsake us or fail us. Let's turn up the sound of the one who will give our hearts its greatest desire, joy and happiness and goodness forever. Jesus is real. So let's turn our hearts to what is real.